Hey,you're right I was really looking forward to chatting with you but I guess thats okay,knowing how important it is to you to be with your sis and the unexpected happens sometimes anyway,we'll make up to it some other day.But I'm glad you'll be okay coz thats the biggest question and worry in my mind, you have fun.Tommorow we're attending a church service in a boarding high school then we have a swimming plot with 'plenty' of buddies its normally fun and I'm looking forward to this.Have a pleasant time see you on the blog on tuesday or maybe tomorrow.I like you and miss you too.
Giddy

Hey, Gids! Listen, I have some really bad news and I know that you are going to be reallydisapointed when you read this so brace yourself, ok? Right now now I am at college with my sister so I only have a few minutes. We had a slight change of plans and I went with her a day early. Which means I won't be able to be online tomorrow morning for you. I'm really sorry becasue I know how important this is to you. I will really be ok, please don't be worried about me or my feelings, ok? I hope that you understand how important you are to me and I really don't mean to blow you off at all and I feel terrible about standing but I hope that you have a good day anyway ok?
I miss you and like you lots.
Beti

Hey, Gids! Listen, I have some really bad news and I know that you are going to be reallydisapointed when you read this so brace yourself, ok? Right now now I am at college with my sister so I only have a few minutes. We had a slight change of plans and I went with her a day early. Which means I won't be able to be online tomorrow morning for you. I'm really sorry becasue I know how important this is to you. I will really be ok, please don't be worried about me or my feelings, ok? I hope that you understand how important you are to me and I really don't mean to blow you off at all and I feel terrible about standing but I hope that you have a good day anyway ok?
I miss you and like you lots.
Beti

I agree with everything you said,the abruptness of all this and how really it doesn't fit what we wanted and I'm not dissapointed at all by anything you said.And let me tell how I feel about this,Bethany I was REALLY looking forward to this.Above all things I wanted to see you,see your family and friends and have a nice time with you.You know how much I miss you,I really do but this university door seems more open than the other,I applied and everything is going on well, I'l actually be meeting one of the proffessors whose husband is the chief academic officer of the university on 23 next month, this is more probable and clear and is still connected to IUSM directly.If I came to the BI for instance,I'd have to start from scracth about where to get funds to attend the pre-training the course itself.I would have to start from 'a' about all those arrangements alone you'll agree that that would have been quite a tricky position for me.Now all that plus my dad who was supposed to be the core of that whole plan is not comfortable about it I wouldn't like to push him coz I don't know how deutrimental that may be.I wouldn't want to ignore a certain sense of inner peace about that decision though my feelings are not for it,I feel I want to be there like yesterday!I really do.plus I have an inner assurance this still is the right channel for us to meet again, think about this, going to moi university is next to a GUARANTEE of coming to IUSM because evrything is catered for in the exchange programme it may be quite a long term plan but more reliable and workable.I feel I really need to answer your questions well cause I feel I haven't so sure enough I'll be there at exactly 6.00pm then we'll talk about it more.I'm realising that as we go through this your helping me a great deal to know and understand myself and my plans of action more.I'm so glad you sound supportive and understanding even now and I'm so proud of you, believe me in all this planning I have you as a very prime factor to determine my direction.I know this is dissapponting and believe me it si to me too but.........okay, we'll chat tomorrow.Goodnight, lets meet tomorrow babe.

I don't really know what to say. You seem so concern with what I think about this. That means alot to me. I wish I could HEAR you tell me all of this. Then I could know how confident you are in this and would share in your excitement. If you are confident in this, that it is God Will, then can I really object? Sure, I'm a little disapointed. But next year still seems so far away and I certainly haven't given up any hope. I am sure that one of these days you will make it over here and I look forward to that day. Will it be difficult for you to get into the University? Is it a tough application process? Have you already applied? And as for the reaction on my face, well... it really didn't do much. I had a testy day at work today. You know, one of those days when I come home and tell my mother that I am never, ever having children. And you are totally right- God's ways are not are ways and we will have to constantly keep that in mind as we go through this. I still really don't know what to say about all this. I feel kind of stunned. That plan seemed so good to me. I don't know if I have made how I feel clear or not and I hope that you are not disapointed. I don't want you to think that I'm crushed and going to go dry in my bedroom for anther six hours or anything like that. I'm happy now that you know what God's wants for you. I really am. And I will be patient with God's timing, even though I don't want to. Everything will work out, I have no doubt. You didn't really tell me how you feel about all this. And that is even more important to me than long term so I will know how to pray for you and how to picture you in my mind every day. It seemed to happen really fast, or is that because it was just in one post? Because of my age, I can't get my liscense until March. I will tell my sister all of that even though we might not go to Chicago at all. We were going to go in oder to see one of our friends and he hasn't gotten back in touch with either of us to confirm anything so I might just be going to college with her. I'd just be gone Sat and I'd be back by Sun evening. And hey I don't have anything going on Sat morning, can you get to a computer anytime? I hope so. It's not a big deal that you didn't get to write me, but I was so relieved and happy and excited when I saw your name. I like you alot.
Bethany
No scary car tonight. My dad called the police yesterday. The reassuring thing was that they never even came.

I'm so sorry for all that silence.I wrote a mail on tuesday and just when I clicked 'post' I realised my time and money was up so I closed the window hoping the mail would somehow go but sadly it didn't, and yesterday we didn't have any ministries in town so we spent the day at the base.I'm so sorry for that silence and I know how it feels,and hey, thanks so so much for writing despite that. please forgive me for that.Otherwise yes, I'm terrific and I've got somenews and I don't know what to call them but I'd say good and bad.Finally it is clear to me what God 's will is for me.I don't know whether you'll understand this, but please tell me what you think about it.I don't know how to begin but I have been asking myself the question why I want to go to Bible Institute, then I asked myself if someone paid a full scholarship for me to go to one of the Bible schools here in Kenya in preference to the University to study medicine, would I go?And I said no.So why would I want to go to a Bible school in the states?And I came to the conclusion that I was seeing the BI mainly as a stepping stone to study medicine in the states.Now I really struggled with that and everyone was of the opinion that I go on with the BI plans,including my mentor , though he said finally,'I think you have known and made up your mind on what is your primary calling and if it is Gods will for you to go to Bible school, he will provide a way and you will know it.'So I prayed and I told God that the last person to confirm this issue would be my dad, by the way he'll be meeting Allan this sat.If my dad would be uncomfortable about mentioning this issue to Allan then I would know for sure that it isn't Gods time.You know the first thing my father said when we met today?"Boy, if Moi University has an exchange programme with the University you want to go to in the states, then why don't I just take you there?"And that was it.It not only confirmed Gods will but showed me that even my dad could tell that the real reason I want to come to the states is to do medicine not theology.Well I told dad not to mention the whole issue to Allan and that I would go to Moi university and thats what I am putting my full attention to now.Bathany I really don't know how you feel about this but I really wish I could and it is important to me,I wish I could see the reaction on your face as you read this mail.Please do not misunderstand me, I'm not being pessimistic or anything,Infact I'm quite sure this would have worked, Allan is a reliable man,but do you believe that I'm convinced that this is God's will for me now?I'm sure that if it is in God's will that I come to the states someday I surely will, maybe through the exchange programme, or even that may not be God's will, I'll never know till I get there.Gods ways are not our ways you know how much I really hoped to be with you soon, don't think this is easy on me as I may sound.It makes me think about you alot.I really like you alot and I was dying to see you again soon,now I don't know when that will happen.What do you feel about all this?I'm I being unobjective?Please tell me exactly what you feel.I like you alot and I want to keep liking you.Its full moon these sides too and I think about you alot.Sorry for the tonsils,I'm also recovering from a cold, sore throat, fever and cough,its bad.Did you finish your driving lessons?I might be taking mine in Dec and 3 weeks from now 5 or 6 weeks of camp begin.I'm so proud of how bold you are in school to proclaim christ and, keep it up.So you're travelling to Chicago with your sis?When will you be back?I wish you a nice time, don't forget to tell her that I still do like you and I want to keep liking you, I told you I have a big picture about you that situations can't obstruct,I'm determined.I miss you Bethany, so much.And there's no hurry to marriage, tell her its okay to take her time.Did you see the scary car today?Goodnight and I'll keep in touch.
Guapisimo

I'm not so sure if I should be worried that I haven't heard from you in so long or not. But I'm praying for you and I hope that you are alright.

Did I ever tell you about my scary dream? Where this guy was following me when I was comming home from practicing piano? Well, not long after that there was this really really scarry thugged-out car not too far from my house and I was really scarred that I was being stalked. IT WAS THERE AGAIN TONIGHT! I was so scarred coming home. It was righ tin the shadows and my eyes kept playing tricks on me. Oh man, my heart is still off-beat, I think. Please pray for our worship service tomorrow in youth group. My youth pastor just called me and asked me to lead it. I'm not ready for it but I hope that I can wing it well and glorify God. I can't wait to hear from you and I hope that you are doing terrific. I like you so much and I wish that you could have been here this evening to see the moon. It was beautiful behind the clouds. Sweet dreams.
Atoti

Hey there, buddy, how was your day off? I learned two very exciting things today. Number 1- my sister might kind of like this other boy too, so she doesn't know what to do about dating either one of them. Maybe I was WAY too accepting of this marriage thing. She's not ready to get married. I'll still have her for a while. Number 2- I don't have any school on Thurs OR Fri! I am looking forward to that so much. Come to find out, my sister might be taking the train up to Chicago so then I can go with her. I love the big city and I'm excited even though nothing is for sure yet. Oh, I have three things! Number 3- today in my history class (I don't remember HOW we got talking about this in history of all classes) we started talking about real love and marrige and I was the only person that thought it was wrong to live together before you got married and it was a really good oppurtunity to voice my opinon from a Biblical stand point in front of the entire class. Please pray for my boldness and discrection in that situation. But things went really well today and everyone had changed thier veirw point by the time I was done (ok, not everybody but a few people contradicted themselves). And my medical mid-term is on Wed and I incredibly unprepared for that so I have just been studying like a monk. I like you so much and I thank God fo ryou all the time.
Bethany

Oh man, I got the phone bill today. At 4 bucks a min, my mom said that it would be a long, long time before I could call you again. Needless to say, neither of my parents we incredibly happy with me. Oh well, it's my money and it was totally worth it. I'm working on them letting me have a phone card. We'll just have to see what happens. What you say about predestination all makes sense to me, but what about John 3 :16, God says "whosoever," He gives no specifications. That is a really good point, though, about God's fairness.I really happy for you and I'm glad that you get some time to spend with your sister. I know how important that is. Which sister is this the married one, or the almost married one? It seems to me like you guys have a lot of holidays. How often do you have them? I was really nervous playing the piano this evening during church. It was so bizarre. I play all this time and for some odd reason. I was even shaking this evening. Maybe it was because my hands were initally trembling because they were cold and that made me nervous but I still cannot get over how nervous I was. I've been thinking about it alot. I'm just wierd like that I suppose. I was really mad today- my dad preached a really good message today, so I heard. I suddenly had to be in the nursery this morning. Sigh- such is life. My tonsils are swollen. I can feel them stretch every time I yawn so I'm going to go to bed and hope that extra sleep makes everything better. I don't have time to be sick. Well, Guapisimo, I'm off to bed. OH, please pray for my sisters boyfriend He's having some problems with his mom right now and is really discouraged. I like you so much.
Bethany
We had goregous full moon tonight. It made me think about you and how much I missed you.

No its okay, it wasn't inconviniencing at all coz while I was writing the mail back which was already six, my msn was signed in and by the time I was done I was sure you weren't around so I left. I'm sorry I made you feel terrible,ok?I like you so much.Another word for a plectrum is a pick(as a noun not a verb),you know, that plastic thing you use to pluck the strings.
Let me try, and hey I very much stand to be corected, but I think that God in his sovereignity and holy purposes choses those that are his(divine election)Are you familiar this verse in romans I think 8 or 7that God has mercy on those whom he wills to have mercy?And this whole whole issue of predestination rotates along justice and mercy.I like the way RC Sproul puts it in his book'chosen by God' that since we are totally depraved and nothing in us will want God unless God himself inclines our desires to himself first, we all deserve death(rom.3:23 and 6:23)Now that is what we deserve (death) and that is justice.If God gives us anything else apart from death that is not justice neither is it injustice for there is no injustice in God .Sproul calls it 'non-justice'.So those who get mercy get non-justice and the rest receive justice for their sins.Now the immediate outcry would be'No! thats not fair!', but think about it, what do we mean by fairness?if by fairness we mean treating people equally then we can rightly say that God is not fair because an objective look at Bible characters will show you that God has not been treating people equally.He did not treat Jacob the way he treated Essau he didn't treat moses the way he treated pharaoh ,he didn't treat Joseph the way the way he treated his brothers neither did Jesus treat Peter the way he treated Judas, remember the last supper he told Judas' go and do what you want to do quickly and to Peter he said' satan has asked to sift you like wheat but I have prayed for you and WHEN you return, strengthen your brothers.'The destiny of these two is clearly determined.Jesus is very sure that peter will fall but will return thats why he says 'When' not 'if'.
Why God choses some people and not others I don't know but I know that in all this God is just in his judgement.But indeed he choose and the word is not a misinterpretation.Enough for now.Well, I'm so excited I get to spend another day with my sister especially a sunday night coz tommorow is a public holiday.I'd love to hear your voice to, you can also try this no. if the other one brings any problem, it belongs to romanus+2540733261452 or +2540722952962.Just try your best, no stress about it. I keep looking forward to seeing you, you mean so so much to me Bethany and I like you so much.Nice time.
Banda G