Oh, I'm so sorry that I forgot to tell you I was going to be gone all today. I feel terrible. I hope it wasn't too inconvinient for you. Do you see sppiders often? I don't think that I saw any while I was there. Maybe I'm forgetting but nothing that significant. Actually, I haven't come very far on the guitar at all. I haven't done any serious practicing for a few days. What's a plectrum? I don't think that I've ever heard of it. Granted, I'm not very familiar with guitar alnuage though. Wow I have lots of questions for you. Do you think that God just picks and chooses who will go to heaven or do you think that the word "choose" in the Bible is just a mis-interpretation? Guess what? Nicloe Nordeman has a new CD out and I cn't wait to see if I can get it. It's called "Woven and Spun"-even the title is way cool. Oh man, how I wish that I could hear you say my name. I miss you so much. I'm going to try to call you soon but I can't promise anything, ok? But I want to SO badly, just to hear your voice again. Sigh, that would be fantastic. Have a challenging Sun.
Atoti

wossssssssssup baby! My day is complete when I sit in front of a computer to write something and to read from you,coz yo mean so much to me, and thats just the least I could do.I wish I was in a capacity to do moere,you know like call you every morning evening and afternoon,but I can't.Hey! you never said anything about chatting so I don't kow whether to wait here a few minutes or assume that you can't make it now that you never mentioned anything about it.Any way the weekend is getting on very well I just came from drama and worship practice and it was all so refreshing.That spider story made me laugh so.You better get learn how to handle spiders if you wanna live in Africa, but that shouldn't make you change your mind.I don't pick the guitar pretty much well but I like to use a plectrum(not sure of spelling).I'd love to hear you play the guitar and see how far you've gotten,I'm sure your making some nice progress.You wann hear my view of predestination?Ask me a question then I'll start from there, ok?I saw on the side of a bus today these words'Atoti lovely'and hey thats what you are and I like you alot and I miss you sana.
Gideon.

Really? And tell me what you think about predestination, if you can via the blog. It is confusing but sometimes I don't know if I'm confused or just off. You know what I mean? Anyway, I hope that I can do a good job with the drama group. I really really do my very best. You see, I just don't know if I my best is any good. I've never done anything like it before with people who really don't know what they're doing.But always an adventure, right? Talking with Adan really didn't make me feel any better. It just made me think that if I had been a better friend to him, maybe he wouldn't be in so far over his head now. But what can I do? I wish I knew, specifically. Today as I was coming home from work, right before I was about ready to walk in the door, there is this huge spider right between the doorbell and the knob. So what could I do? I couldn't touch either for fear that the spider would jump on me. So I decided to just wiat outside for the spider to crawl away. I stood there for five minutes beore my mom saw me and let me sneak in. I was so relived but my mom has been giving me a hard time about it all night. Today for our English class we went down to listen to this woman play ballads on the guitar because that is what we're studying right now. She was so amazing! Her fingers were picking so fast that I could't even tell where they were going. It was so cool and inspired me to come home and work on my picking. Oh man, I still can't really belive it. And no, I don't really hate snow at all. I really like it, it's beautiful when its fresh. I just don't like how it seems to give autunm no chance to finish. You'd have a good time with my brothers- they LOVE to play in the snow. Well, thank you for taking tim eout for me almost every day just to write me. It is so important to me and you mean so much to me. Sweet dreams, Gideon.

I have like 10 books to go in my Bible reading, all in the old testament.They kinda put me off because they are long and not very thrilling or eventful, books like Jeremiah,chronicles and numbers.Anyway I'm determined.Its good you had some time with Adam I hope that made you feel better.Guess what?Predestination is my most favourite doctrine and its its kinda a hard doctrine to grasp with human reasoning and views. I have never taught any class about it but its just good for my own growht for now, we sometimes discuss it with the rest of the team here for our own knowledge but we hardly teach it coz it can be so confusing.You don't like snow?I understand you lived with it lke for the whole of your life,but I guess I'd be excited to play with snow at least for once,but I guess autumn must be the weather in heaven,right?Just teach those people the best way you know how,I know you can do it coz thats ma girl-she does what she's gotta do,doen't she?-
Well get to visit ma sister this weekend but I'll check mail tomorrow coz we have drama and worship practice in the afternoon hey! we could even chat if I get enough bucks, so you'll tell me if you'll be available through the blog if yes, then when the time comes I'll tell you online ma situation tomorow.Wow have all the happy memories when those videos come and don't forget to send me one if you can.YOU WILL RECEIVE THE PACKAGE one of these days.i like you with all my heart.Have a nice weekend.
Giddy.

It's easy to forget, I know. Adam came over again this evening. I was practicing piano and all of a sudden he was just behind me sitting and listening. He scarred me to death. WE talked to a long time and I think that he is going to drop out of college or change his major or something. I don't know. We had an interesting conversation about the Bible, his life, etc. We talked about Predestination in youth group the other night. It was so mind-boggling. And yet fun, because I'm always up for a good debate. However, we got no where. The drama group is certainly going to be interesting this year. Only 2 of the 7 has ever acted like we do before now and for as much as I like to teach, I'm struggling with this because I don't know if I'm doing a good job or if it is even effective to teach by example in this kind of a circumstance. Maybe I just don't know how to teach them well. You know what makes me mildly angry? The weather. My favorite season always gets ripped-off. Just once it is beining to cool off all of a sudden it decides to snow. We get like three real day sof autumn. Maybe that's why I like it so much-I've never been a big fan of the ordinary. How far have you gotten in your Bible reading? I hope that I will have a dream about you soon. Guess what? Dave Kelly emailed us and said that we should be getting our videos soon! I'm so excited! I can't wait to see you. Every day I am checking the mail with desperate hope to see a package.
Hopefully soon, Bethany

Alright alright alright, thanks for that very important reminder to take things a day at a time and for reminding me of my latest name'Mr. Optimistic' huh! That was funny(honestly) and made me remember that Iam human and that sometimes I doubt, I remember some time back you asked if I thought my plans would work and what was my reply?I was very optimistic then-I stil am(especially after the encouragement from you) and thats why I'm so blessed to have you and I thank God for you.Infact dad tells me the same thing always 'son,'he says,'take these issues a day at a time, only Gods will upon your life wil come to pass only be still and know that he is God, know that he has a good plan for you and that in his own time he makes all things beautiful!....' Such marvelous truths that I keep forgetting!Anyway there's much cutting the sides as I told you things are moving kinda slowly,but my Bible reading keeps me really busy I want to be done with it very soon then embark on reading books and commentaries as I make notes.My friend Reuben and I are working on a poetic song, you understand?Its a song and a poem at the same time, he's a perfect poet so that makes a marvelous combination, I sing my parts and he recites his lines, I'm looking forward to the finished art of it all, its my first time I have something like it.I really don' have much to write so why don't you enjoy the benefit of more time for sleep and have plenty of those dreams of me, all the best as you try to.Anyway good night and I like you than my guitar(ha ha ha)
Giddy

I hope that I'm not getting sick. I've been so tired lately. I don't know what's wrong with me. I love random questions, don't get me wrong, but I wasn't sure if I said something earlier that made you think that I was mad at my sister or somebody. And hey, that article is really cool and I am really excitd about that. What's all this your plans failing? Let's take this one day at a time, Mr. Optimism, ok? Don't forget that God has plans for your life too that never fail. Not that I wouldn't love to come back but let's just be patient. Sounds good? Yeah, and I talked to my teacher again today and for as much as I thought on Mon that she understood what I was trying to day, she didn't. It's such a foriegn concept- humility. Anyway, the "oh no" was because the blogger told me that my page had expired yesterday after I hit post so I got scared and I wanted to see if it would post anything and Oh no was the first thing that came to my mind. I'm tired and I miss you and I am SO ready for a dream about you. I enjoy even the illusion of you.
With high hopes,
Atoti

look at this I found it in the IU website, maybe the IU dream is not too impossible after all if my plans for Moi University work,that is if plan "A" doesn't work first.
" the Indiana University School of Medicine has joined with the Moi University Faculty of Health Sciences in Eldoret, Kenya, to build a unique exchange program.

Highly technological western medicine challenges the mind. The medicine of sub-Saharan Africa challenges the heart and soul. Practicing there, even for a brief time, can be a profoundly life changing event...

American and Kenyan medical students, residents and faculty contribute their intelligence and energy to the project. Now, with the establishment of the IU Kenya Endowment, any individual or institution with an interest in international medicine can contribute to this deeply compassionate and culturally sensitive work.

This unique partnership promotes responsible citizenship and health for the human family. It fosters the values of integrity, service to others and intellectual growth. Through this exchange, Indiana University medical faculty role models, their trainees and their Kenyan counterparts experience firsthand the powerful combination of knowledge and cultural compassion...

what is that 'OH no' for down there?Yeah sorry, I asked you a very random question, but that was after I thought about you and your sister then I thought about how often some sisters fight and thats when I bagan wondering whether you get very mad sometimes, never mind.So that's what happened?I'm proud of you for taking up that opportunity to be a light for christ, but Jesus is proud of you even more. It never ceases to amaze me how most Americans fail to see the power in christ, he is not mentioned in high schools and every kind of moral perversion crops up from there.It's not like this place is any better,"we're getting there."But I'm amazed even the more by the curriculum in your high school, you know like,what subject is that that teaches 'self worship?'sounds dangerous to me but I know there's worse.Anyway I'm so glad you know whom you live for and you know your stand about such issues.Today we don't have any ministry so I came to town only to check mail then head back and do my Bible reading I didn't finish it by sunday but I'm still trying.Hey did I tell you I found my way around the chords on the keyboard?Well I actually did and I played the keyboard during the worship session in our teens class and I hope to be doing so a couple of sundays to come, I'm so excited because I can play any song that I can play on the guitar because the chord sequence is the same., I only have to improve on my fingering speed, I wish I had a teacher, any way I like the challenge of trying to find out things for myself.Let me ask you, look at this beautiful statement you wrote,
"Ooooh, I like you too and I can't wait to see you again even though I don't know how long that will take. I miss you"
You know I have been thinking about that,we don't know how long it will take before we see each other again and we both long for that.What if my plans fail?Can you work out some thing? like can you travel this way soon after you graduate from high school for like a week or two?Man I would love that, I'd take you to all ma joints and what I think are the coolest places in the Kenyan coast, but more,just being with you, seeing you face to face,hearing your voice again,being together with you would give be the boost to wait for like four more other years as you do your college .By the way when do you get to graduate high school?I'm dying to see you again and I'm really praying about it. Well, I bet you had a nice day like I'm having and you also need some nice rest, well you got it, sleep tight and sweet dreams.
Banda.

OH no

Yeah, I actually made my teacher cry. Where to start? My teacher so one onf those religious poeple that believes highly in putting yourself first and having high self esteem and "you can't make anyone else happy unless you have inner peace" kind of a person. Well, she makes us do these journal entries in order to get in touch with our "inner-beings" after she reads us part of this book that talks about how important it is to make time to have pleasure in your life and to think highly of yourself. Well, I started talking about how I disagree with most of the things she's been saying and she says that good to be strong in your beliefs, etc. Well, we started talking about self esteem and how I am nothing and as soon as I finnished saying that she says NO YOUR NOT! HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT? She starts freaking out on me and is telling me that I mean something to her so that makes me important and I said that it wasn't me that she saw but Jesus Christ shinning through me because the real Bethany Webb is a nasty girl that she never wants to meet and she said NO! YOU MEAN SO MUCH TO ME! YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON THAT EVERY DAY ASKS ME HOW MY MOM IS (she is dying of cancer) AND HOW I AM DOING. (this is when the tears started) On my worst days you are the only person who has asked me if I would be ok. You are NOT nothing.You l mean a lot to me" Well, we discussed it some more and I explained to her that it's not that I really have low self confidence becuase I have Christ in my life and I know that I can do ANYTHING through him. The cool part was that whenever anyone uses the words "Jesus Christ" in school and is not cussing, you really draw attention. So me saying Jesus Chrsit and my teacher yelling at me got the entire class focused upon our discussion and it brought forth some good oppurtunities.
I know that all this with Adam is not entirely my fault but I still feel really bad about the whole thing. I know that if I had really tried I could have been a better friend to him and maybe he wouldn't be where he is now. I don't know. Anyway, in my eyes you DO have all the answers because no matter what kind of problem I'm having you always seem to have something to say that makes me feel better. Do I get angry? Where did that come from? I do but not often. Usually only when I'm real tired. The only way that I ever show my anger (when I'm with people) is bitting my tongue or clenching my jaw. Sometimes I cry but not unitl I get home and can do so unnoticed. Ooooh, I like you too and I can't wait to see you again even though I don't know how long that will take. I miss you.
Bethany

mmh! you made your teacher cry?That sounds interesting, I'm curious to know what happened.i missyou so much that today I carried a picture of you in my Bible coz I want to se your face and think about you more often.Its good you and your sister had a nice time, you know some times I try to imagine you angry or furious but my imagination clogs up and I can't picture that, do you get reeeeeeeeeally mad sometimes? I'm sorry about Adam, and hey I also don't know what to say and I hope that I have not created any implications that I know stuff or or I'm experience in life coz that aint the case at all.I'm still a leanerI'm yet to see,hear and do so much that I haven't yet.I understand how you feel about Adam, you feel you have failed.you say you backed off, didyou really? I don't really think you backed off, I think you did your best I remember you'd tell me he called you and you guys would talk over the phone for long! see ? you made time for him, doesn't he come to your place?Do you chase him away when he comes?No! you also remember you told me how Adam was contradicting himself when you talked? I think Adam needs to recollect himself and claim Gods truths, what God says about him and not what people say he is or what he thinks he is and also we can't be the 'Jesus' of every situation so don't blame yourself.
Anyway Its okay we can always do better can't we?we can always go an extra mile for someone,but I know its never too late you still can do something, but I don't know exactly what, maybe pray more and stop trying(human effort) and trust God more.
We haven't got a new director yet, that has to be decide by the head quaters in NY but we're okay though struggling especially with finances but we trust God for our daily provisions.
Good night girl, I miss you and I can't help saying it over and over again coz I reeeealy do miss you.And I like you more than anything else.
Giddy

Hey there, Gids. How was your day? Mine was long and I just got home from something that I thought would get me home an hour and a half ago. Well, I really need to get some sleep because tommorow is my PSAT test. I just thought I drop you a note and remind how much I like you and that I'm praying for you.
Bethany
Oh, please pray for my mt teacher. I made her cry today. I'll tell you that story tommorow when I have energy. She just needs lots of prayer.

I can't belive you! I could swear I remember someone giving me such a hard time about that. I also could swear I remember you saying that you could see...fifteen, was it? You want a picture of me in my scrubs, huh? Well, actually I have a confession. I'm a terrible girlfriend and yet still have not sent you any pictures. But, trust me, I have a good excuse- I really wanted to send you some mud wrestling pictures and the lady who is supposed to give them to me says I'll have them next time I see you, next time I see you. So I keep waiting for her. She told me to call her so I think that I'll have them WEd. You're tme with your sister reminds me very much of mine. We always stay up late and do goofy things. Some of my most fond memories of her are when we are out late at night. I had a really good time with her this evening. We made a really big mess in the kitchen and we were just laughing and laughing and laughing trying to get it all cleaned up. Peer pressure is also an interesting topic. I don't belive that it exists. It is all pressure that you put on yourself, I think. Maybe that doesn't make sense. What are you talking about? I am too ignorant. I have no idea what life is like and I pretend that I have everything all figure out all the time. I don't know anything. But I got the chance to talk to Adam tonight and he is really discouraged and I think that he is about ready to drop out of college and I feel reallly bad like it's my fault. I should have known that he would need a closer friend when he graduated. I should have been able to handle that whole situation better that how I just backed off. I should have known better. I feel so bad. I wish you could have seen the hoplessness in his eyes. sigh. He wrote me this whole email about how he is a failure at so many things and how he doens't know what to do. I don't know what to do. Anyway, I need to go but how is everything going now that Danson is gone? Is someone going to replace him or what? My youth group has been praying for that situationa a lot. have a productive day, Gids. I like you.
Beti

No we do not have halloween but I know what that is.Well you asked a very good qustion about friends, what I mean is a human being learns by copying mostly what is around him, depending on who spends most time around him, if therefore like most cases the peiple who hung around you are you friends , you're most likely to acquire habits and behavioural patterns from your friends and them from you, the effect of this infact is so great and thats why youth workers like us dwell so majorly on issues of peer pressure and external influnce on choice.Hey! you're neither ignorant nor narow minded, and I like your inquinsitive mind. Yeah we went to talk about wedding issues but first I must tell you that I really really had a nice time cause ALL members of my family were home,When I arrived on friday evening I took my sisters out for a drink at a near villas till like eleven pm .Then the next day I had a chance to talk to my brother about some issues that he' going through and I thank God for the opportunity to shre with him what I thought in light of the Gospel.WEll now I'm back and I we're leaving in afew monutes' time for swimming, I can't wait but I so much wish that you were here .Its the most wonderful thing for mr to know that 'Bethany likes me, she prays for me everyday and she misses me' and all that, ditto.Have a nice time with everyone!Hey I'd really love to see how you like in those scrubs,lovely I know-as usual.Take care,God bless and lead you along his will.
Your veeeeeeeery own, beefy boy.

Hey don't wory about patch Adams, you must be much better off because honestly I don't see more than 5 fingers myself, the concept behind is is just what I like to play around with.